Every one gets to a point in their lives when they think they’ve got it bad, that their life sucks and nothing can possibly go right.  Yet, it’s not until we start living for others that we realize that our lives are not all that bad and there’s always somebody else with the same layers of problems, with different people playing the parts of Wronged and Offender.

Usually, when I get to a point when I start thinking to myself or vocalizing that things aren’t going well, it is because I’ve been out to “get mine”.  I mean, was I not raised as if I was a manufactured cookie in some industrial cookie factory, with massive cookie cutters designed to produce identical cookies?   I was told to go to school, get the best grades so I can go to the best university, to get the best degree, to make the most money, to buy the biggest house to surround with the tallest fence so that no one can partake in my “best”, and somewhere in there marry a trophy wife and produce a few kids to carry on the family name so that I can leave them at home to be raised by a nanny while both mommy and I work our tails off.   Going in, I would already know that I had a fifty-fifty chance of having “irreconcilable differences” and getting a divorce, which destroys the kids who then get put on anti-depressants for being sad, which in turn turns them into lethargic robots.  Yet is that all not “the dream”?  Am I not supposed to live for myself and get mine?

So why is it then that people can’t seem to understand that that “good feeling” they get when they put on a food drive, donate gifts on Christmas, or every once in a great while ride the roller-coaster high they get while working on a community project for a day is a normative feeling they are meant to have all the time because they are fully capable of serving others consistently?  Happiness does not come from within, but from outside ourselves.  Why do people fail to see that working for the man is not and never can be as fulfilling as serving men?

As if God is shouting the message, “You think you’ve got it bad, you whiny baby!” into my ear with a bullhorn, He continually reminds me that showing love for others by serving them in any way I can shows me that this world is full of disappointment because when everyone is trying to serve themselves, there is no one left to be a friend, call family, or love at all.

People are lonely and hurting.  I know this because when I, a complete stranger, visited three households today, I was greeted like a king, shown hospitality that I thought did not exist anymore and people may think of as “old school”.  I cared just a little and it was like floodgates were released, releasing a tsunami of stories full family strife, death, incarceration, hatred, malice, sadness, guilt, and bitterness.

After longing to evangelize and visit with those in the local community since arriving in Louisiana, God gave me a gift and it had nothing to do with me.  With the companionship of Dan and Matt from a crew of volunteers from Harvest Bible Church in DeKalb, Illinois, I visited the homes of Elcy and Elaine, Florida, and Danielle and Geraldine.

We three heard amazing stories, filled with struggle caused by hurricane Katrina, but we also heard more personal stories about the death of a husband, a son being put in prison, a sister who is so hateful that she has alienated all of her relatives and went as far as to admit she was trying to break up the marriage between her brother-in-law and sister, the death of a daughter/sister at a young age from breast cancer splitting apart a family of six, and feelings of guilt for wrongdoings.  One of those we visited even broke down crying and could not express herself other than to say she felt guilty.  Possibly the most in-depth and heavy conversation we had was about praying to deceased people instead of God.

To those who are reading it, it probably seems there is no hope and those we visited seemed very lost.  However, there was light and hope.  It came shining through during the conversations when all of those we visited expressed they couldn’t be more appreciative of Dan, Matt, and I simply visiting them and taking the time to listen to them and pray for them.  We were told, “You come back soon now, ya hear?” genuinely.  The gospel message was shared and the worthiness of the Bible was discussed.  One of those we visited is now thinking about hosting a Bible study so that we come back and visit and can invite her neighbors.

These people, with their broken hearts, guilt, and loss have experienced more hurt than I can possibly imagine, yet they sat and talked to us for hours, bought us lunch, cut us pieces of cake, refused to let us clean up our own dirty dishes, and let us inside their homes to talk to us for hours.  They told complete strangers about their lives and some of their inner-most struggles.

I am left feeling so touched and in awe of the power of listening as a form of servant-ship that I can barely write this blog post without coming to tears.   How should I, the master complainer, be so blessed as to be used to bring joy into the lives of strangers?  There are many any where and every where waiting for the opportunity in which someone will listen to them and give them answers that aren’t generic, but heartfelt and genuine.  There are many waiting to be told that they don’t have to live within their hurt any longer.

And that’s how I continue to learn why I have no reason to complain.  Ever.

— Timothy Young

P.S.  If you are interested in an evangelism-centered retreat, check out information about our Homeland Missions EPC Retreat option:  http://sghm.org/news/2010/06/20/epc-mission-trips/